I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize