Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Rumble strips road head = magical
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
