have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize