So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Randomize