his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize