Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize