We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
