Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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