its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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