i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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