I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
