Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Randomize
