Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
