I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
