Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
