I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i was born a porn star she said
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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