The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Of course I have a pirate flag
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
