woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
