dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Enjoy the penises
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
