i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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