How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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