Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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