Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
You are the jesus of drinking
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
