So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
it's great music for shaving your balls
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
If I had your ass I would rule the world
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
