I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
