the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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