So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
