I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
