My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
