You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
i think my cat just said my name.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I think we might need a safe word for this...
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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