I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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