Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
