Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Randomize
