I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
