When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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