i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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