Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize