why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
