the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize