so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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