I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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