Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize