My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
