I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize
