Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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