i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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