Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize