Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Randomize
