reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Randomize