Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
