Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
